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    Just like on a roller coaster, fear and excitement go hand in hand. The male heroes are usually rugged warrior types and these books may illustrate a desire to "conquer the heart of the rapist" and tame him for marriage. So those who have been sexually abused may Women seeking sex partners in impurity to master their trauma by taming those experiences. The writer Tracie Egan hints at this explanation in her essay entitled " One Rape Please To Go " about hiring a male prostitute to play-rape her which I recently saw her read live: But in some cases it may recapitulate forgotten abuse that hasn't been processed properly, or it may reflect masochistic tendencies.

    A woman should see a professional if she's troubled by her fantasies. Julie Shulmana clinical psychology professor at Alliant International University who has studied rape fantasies [pdf] told me, "the sexual and emotional health of such engagement can differ greatly," and would like to see more research on the topic. Should women share their rape fantasies with their partners? She said it's not unhealthy per se: Pretending to rape someone, Rachel says, is "a lot of responsibility to assume, and if you're dealing with a woman who does have a history of sexual abuse in her past, it's extra thorny.

    Paul Joannides, author of the wonderful Guide To Getting It On, raises a couple of good points in a post on his own blog. First, in most rape fantasies, the guy is a hunk, and the woman isn't terrified or disgusted.

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    The Dangers of Convenient Sex Unfortunately, much like a casino app in the hands of a compulsive gambler, those struggling with sexual addiction and similar sexual problems see sex finder apps as the equivalent of crack cocaine. And, as with all addictions, whether to substances or behaviors, the consequences to the active abuser can be profound.

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    It changes how you view your body, your worth, and the way you will forever see your environment. This is what escaped me before when trying to understand purity. I thought of it as being a strictly physical thing. I did not understand the emotional ramifications until it played out in my own life. We hear in the Christian realm that it is biblical to save yourself sexually for only your spouse. Even though I was raised a believer, I failed miserably in this area. There were some reasons that were not my choice, and some reasons that were my choice. As a result, I was not pure the first time I entered marriage. Naturally, I was not the second time either. What the Church failed to teach me was that purity is not just physical.

    I learned I am damaged. I learned I am normal. I learned I am not alone. I mean we understand the concept of affairs and porn. You can witness a divorce. You can witness all that happens on both sides.


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