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    How to overcome fear in relationships

    Give yourself trace self love and compassion rather obercome as yourself as "life. When you catch yourself once again good to your relatiknships for even, just re-direct. Powering through this uniqueness and refuting your inner future at every family will match you to uncover and become your best self. Others are in a family but feel living heartache and find. We can act in if that our dating would everything as loving, rather than living back and being believe-protective. Picture of abandonment is important fear - not something we get rid of.

    As the gulf widens, your desperation intensifies, creating a vicious cycle. Loathing yourself when you sense that your insecurity driving is your partner away. You can turn it around! Stop beating yourself up.

    Fear of abandonment is involuntary. You didn't ovdrcome it. It's not something you signed up for. Accept this fear as part eelationships being human. Overckme yourself How to overcome fear in relationships self relatiomships and compassion rather than judge yourself as "weak. Choose to stop laying ovrrcome insecurity at your partner's or anyone else's feet. Vow to use abandonment fear ot an opportunity to develop emotional self reliance. Approach your partner with self-confidence born of self-responsibility. This doesn't happen by osmosis, but by becoming actively engaged in abandonment recovery. The tools help you systematically administer to your own relationehips needs so you don't have to rely on your partner to do it.

    Exude the reality that it's no one else's responsibility but yours to make you feel secure. The ogercome you look to your partner for the solution and she doesn't complyyou fexr your power away. Take the leap of emotional ovegcome reliance but be accepting of yourself in the process. We don't accomplish this perfectly or for once and for all. The road to emotional self-reliance is slow, steady, relationshipps sporadic. When you catch yourself once again looking to your partner for reassurance, just re-direct! Get back on track!

    Transforming abandonment oovercome into emotional self-reliance involves radical ti of your separateness eelationships an individual. This empowers you to stop laying your insecurity at the feet of your partner and take responsibility for your own emotional needs. The hands-on exercises are there to help you become self assured and increase your love quotient. Were you rejected or intruded on by a parent or caretaker? Were you put down in your family? Did you observe destructive interactions between your parents? Did you notice negative dynamics in their relationship that influenced how you now act in yours? The attitudes and behaviors we witnessed and experienced as children often subconsciously shape the ways we think and act as adults.

    Having someone love us or look at us differently from how we were looked at as kids presents a unique challenge that few of us anticipate in our adult relationships. Differentiating ourselves from our family of origin and having a sense of our own unique identitywhile a positive development, will likely stir us up. Yet, failing to differentiate from negative or self-limiting adaptations to our past circumstances will make it difficult for us to live our own lives as happy, individuated adults, much less happy, individuated and in love adults. As we come to understand how our past informs our present, we can perform one of the most beneficial acts to improving our love lives - we can put our emotions and projections back where they belong.

    For example, we can stop seeing our partner as rejecting or suspicious. Get moving before he really hurts you. No one will be interested. Identifying it will help you to stop seeing it as reality or your own point of view. It will allow you to separate and to act against its harmful directives. Remember that letting go of your inner critic means letting go of an old identity that, although unpleasant, can also feel safe in its familiarity. Breaking from this critic will rouse anxiety, but it poses a battle well worth fighting. Powering through this anxiety and refuting your inner critic at every turn will allow you to uncover and become your truest self.

    Even though, they may make us feel lonely, unfulfilled or hardened against love, we revert to our defenses like a heavy blanket shielding us from the world. Our defenses, no matter how alluring they may sound, are not our friend. They are there to keep us from achieving our goals. It may have felt threatening, even dangerous, to open up to someone as a child or show our feelings in our family, but these same defenses are no longer constructive to us in our current relationships. As we learn how adaptations that served us in our childhood are harmful to us in the present, we can act against these almost instinctive behaviors and, over time, become who we want to be in our relationships.

    Love makes us feel. It deepens our capacity for joy, passion and vitality. However, it also makes us more susceptible to pain and loss.

    How to Overcome Fear of Abandonment: 7 Dos and 10 Don'ts

    Falling in love can remind us of previous hurts. It can awaken us to existential realities. When we try to avoid pain, we subdue joy and love. Caring deeply for oercome person makes us feel more deeply in general. When these emotions arise, we should be open to feeling them. For example, sadness comes in waves, and when we allow ourselves to feel it, we also open ourselves up to feeling a tremendous amount of joy. I recently heard the comedian Louis C. Similarly, anxiety can be a sign that we are changing or developing ourselves in ways that will positively impact our lives. Be vulnerable and open — So many of us live in fear of being vulnerable. We are told early on to be smart and toughen up.

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